Not forgotten...

Mr. Aaron Yap A.K.A Xiao Zhu Zomb.
Well.. it's been a long time since we've seen you here at Ph. But know your always welcome here. We actually waited for your appearance here, bro.. but i guess it's okay if you have other things. One less Zomb now oh.. how lerh? ish~ I hope your doing well in everything, and that you've found peace too. Just don't forget bout' God. He moves things in your life, clears your obstacles, sows comfort in you. He changed things in mine and everyone else's. So trust your goals and dreams to him. Members miss you.

.:on behalf of powerhouse & the Zombs:.

Fear..

It's been long since i've wrote.

yea..

Stupid internet connection.

Today i just got my report card and I don't think I wanna report about it cuz basically I failed. Big time.. and the reason for that couldn't be more obvious than it already is - dancing and drama. I honestly don't know how I'm going to improve on those important subs (mainly maths and science) cuz i haven't been reading ANYTHING for the past.. wha? one and a half months? which doesn't really sound like much but it is. T.T

Other things.. teacher's day just passed last week and I gotta say it was pretty boring. Except for our dance performance. Duh. >.<>

Around this coming August, be sure to check out the biggest event to hit our school: MUSIC FEST 09'. Organised by Lok Yuk alone, this is a must-attend for all those who love music and dancing. Cuz there'll be plenty of it. Extras too. Singing accompanied by instruments, dancing partnered by bass. Vocals, rhythm, lyrics, beats, moves, flow... I'll be darned if it's possible to even say that day will be boring. But often i expect more than that from an event everyone can't wait for. Which is all the more hype when it's mentioned the Xydro Family members are coming. *cue girl scream* If I'm not mistaken, Diva crew will be there as well. (they ARE Lok Yukians la pls) And this time the event drags on cuz there will be an AFTERPARTY babeh!! *cue guy giggle* And in that afterparty comes battles.. freestyle battles. Of course, we can't be serious about smoking the Xydros in Bboying. ITS IMPOSSIBLE. So shut up Adidas.

Moves i really gotta learn to make a show on the freestyle floor with my crew: Flare. Transitions of Flare to Windmill and reverse. A signature air-freeze. And if possible, a headspin, 1990 or Air-Flare. With just a few months to learn these golden moves that will literally boost our crew reputation when battling with the Xydros, i ain't gonna chance it away. But unlike other dance styles, Bboying.. or 'Breaking', is different. One being that it obviously takes a lot of tolerance for pain and a brave heart to try out new and more riskier moves. Feel like taking a trip to the hospital? then try out a backflip or headspin. Funny how i get my shoulders hurt when it's a HEADspin I'm doing. Tai-Ngong.

The more i dance, the more i realise how much dancing can actually spread roots. The way it gives chances of knowing more people, and being stronger with those around you, relationship-wise. But of course, it's not always easy. In the progress of choreography, crew management, schedule planning, and attendance for practices.. there's always a chance things will go unpleasant. Members start to disagree, take on their own ideas and stand firmly on them, become hostile towards each other over anger, gossip about the performance of a member, and worse comes to worst.. the crew breaks apart.

I've been dancing a lot since the day I started serving the Good Lord and in every dance I've ever participated in, I always see dis satisfactions and arguments. These things eating away at the hearts of those who do what they feel most passionate for - dancing. The motivation that drives them to dance together slowly fades and instead it becomes a war of who is better and who is above.

These kinds of things shouldn't exist. Isn't it possible to calmly accept the choices made? and if not, find one that appeals most to the majority of the crew? When a crew forms and comes together there is one objective that is constantly there. They have the desire to dance together in unity, doing what they love together. The main word being 'together'. Often times it's about ego. It's about how much one thinks he/she is better than the other. These types of mindsets will lead that dancer to believe he/she has the authority to manipulate the plan itself into something only ONE PERSON has the taste for. With that, the rest of the dance practices become less enjoyable. more repulsive. and done with an unsatisfied heart. Tell me.. can the whole crew survive with that? Know the answer is no.

And to you, lovely.
-I've fallen-

Sincerely yours, J.

Suddenly..

Today at the end of school i was freakin happy. For no reason. AT ALL.

I was all smiles lol.

Well.....________ This coming Monday gotta go and have my hair cut.

hahahahahahhaaa..

Okay, maybe my hair isn't that long now, but still. Our school is 'discipline driven' and they'll let nothing stop them from having all the boys bald. Just watch out and don't go to Lok Yuk if you even actually thought of moving there. Especially you Russell!!

Oh yeaahhhh... i asked why our class got relocated next to the toilet right? and i just found out it was because one of my classmate buddies got his leg busted, hospitalised, and casted and so this makes it all the more convenient to him. Grr.

Anyways we'll hopefully move out back to our original class in the new block next week and you students occupying our class can now kiss it goodbye!! muahahahahhaa

Seriously I wasn't kidding about the suffering we had. Sometimes there's even the strong scent of fishies that come about. Makes you wonder what they wash the toilet with.. hmm..

aww..

Just last week our church had a church camp for this 2009, almost like a custom that we have it once a year and i UBER LOVE IT!! Being there alone already excites me and the weather is Fr3aK!n DESIRABLE. Getting hot and sweaty down here in KK ain't my thang bro. Kinda reminds me of Shimla, India... The snow and bone chilling wind that bites at your ears and ungloved hands.. WHOOO!

*feels the excitement*

The sessions there where the main thing though. There was Pastor Phillip that brought us through his messages and words about 'finishing well' in life. in spirit. It was deep.

When we got there my assigned room mates were to be David Gan and Matthew Lok. Who knew we would get the chalet rooms? *cue dramatic music* It was nice and cold and cute and.. small. small?!

Even Danielle (wabbit) and Abigail (Queen of laughter and sista to beloved Andie) couldn't believe a word I was saying bout how beautiful the view and the room is up there. That is.. until i took out the key from my pocket.. The best part was the position at which the room was. Number #13, perfectly positioned to have the best view than all the other chalets, it had a balcony so wide you could party all night up there with a classload of people. And we did. But with 6. Still... it was fun in a cold kinda way.

Then another day we went to Don Bosco's orphanage. It was just a 15 minute drive away (or so i think) and a couple of laughters later we got there.

The kids there were nice and friendly, from primary schools to secondary form 5s. We basically got there to make friends with them and show them how God works in our lives, to not give up in their dreams and ambitions, to trust God with it. After that we just left lo.. happy to know we brought not just gifts but joy. aww~

Getting back down here was just "devastating" lol. I mean.. it was hard to leave the weather, the memories. Cuz i really love that place.. it gives me an unknown sense of comfort and relief. Maybe it's becuz i'm so far away from all the problems and all the threats. ya la tu Garry..

So.. right now our exams for this month is officially over. Dancing will no doubt naturally come back into our crew member's hearts. And we will certainly enjoy it.

The small important end..

This will be one of my shortest updates people, but my unstoppable uber long lines of essay-ish paragraphed-ish words will still plague your lazy blog reading butt kay..

So here's it.
The examinations are still in progress and i don't feel the slightest "Oh my tian, got exam" expression. So yeah.. it's worrying that I'm taking things too easily as they come. Other than that its VERY very annoying to have our class change to a position just next to the guys toilet. What did my class do to deserve this when i had dance practices?! It's so freakin' pleasurable.. -the smell. ESPECIALLY at around 11a.m. that's where the smell starts to shine. Sh*t style. Lately I've been laughing a lil' too much though i don't know why. You guys out there might think : "oh.. that's normal" but it's not. If you know me you'll know i don't laugh THAT MUCH. So either I'm enjoying life (at the wrong time) or I'm un-consciously emo. Have i told you people that can't seem to understand why they feel this and that annoys me? They do. But apparently I'm one of them now. lalalalala loli loli oh lollipop~

I guess this year has given me a lot of chances to do things, things that i love and the time to spend with those beloved. It's made me find favour in a lot of things i may otherwise just look past. Volleyball for instance has become second to my passion for dancing. It's also the only favourite that has allowed me to meet so many people in such a short event. Love it to the max..

As much as other things, drawing is right up my list. There's so much spare time that i involuntarily indulge in art too often this year. Exams are just another bugger that has me finding entertainment in drawing on the back of the test paper or on my hand (like girls do). Maybe i should take up sketching or designing..
haha.. just a thought..

Guess this starting Monday I'll have to join the drama practices again since my throat isn't clogged anymore. It's just been tormenting not being able to talk for the past four days or so. Now I'm so used to it I'd suddenly whisper at times..

This year will undoubtedly be very different from the next. Though not just becuz of the obvious examinations next year, but rather the time and freedom this year gives. The time and opportunity to try things has vastly changed part of my lifestyle. I know it's so cliche' and lol but it's true. I just hope i don't enjoy the freedom too much and neglect whats important..

Well..

I hope I'm not gone when you start to realise.. Love ya.

Hey folks..

So yeah.
This week's been just about okay. Having secondary dance practices because I'm dancing for both my own crew and another.. gonna have brain surgery soon. Multi-tasking is killing me now, cuz I've got an exam coming this Tuesday and I'm still involved with two separate dance routines and a drama play. I'm ACTUALLY worried about my studies for the first time.. everyone from my class is telling me to fail together lol.

Lately part of our SMF crew walked from school all the way to the 'nearest' Pizza hut restaurant. Which may have been either a kilometer away or less with the afternoon sun down on us. It might seem far but the girls insist that it's not so i don't know. It was fun though.. all of us having seemed to go high suddenly.. especially in the aquarium shop. Gawd i just love em'..

*Currently sitting in front of the computer with a Ferrero Rocher on the table*
Wondering why it's just there? haha..
I've had a sore throat for the whole day now, which coincidentally i was supposed to sing today with my church's youth at the old folks home somewhere in the Kinarut area. Go Garry.

Now it's so bad i can't speak. emphasis on can't. Only way to communicate? Whispering and doing freakin' hand signals that makes me look like I've had this condition for months. Yesterday i had a game of volleyball starting from 9 till 12 noon. With the heat toasting everyone (you should check me out by the way) and shadows failing to appear for shelter, i bought a coke and even ate some chocolates though my throat wasn't exactly happy about it.

This morning was the same. Worse still actually.. and i still i had fried chicken for breakfast. "pandai la kau" by Andie. Jadi kenapa? Siapa juga kau? ah *******

hahahhahaaa..

So the debate to eat or not to eat the Ferrero Rocher continues..

"Pre-examination stress in progress"

Still freakin' excited

It's been two days now since the volleyball competition for the guys. But..
I'm still freakin high on what happened. so yeah.. i can't really control myself. Maybe I'm still high from the bakat event. IDK. But something's surely got me looking forward to.. well.. i really don't know..

The bakat event, though I've said it before and we got 3rd, still gives me flashbacks on what ifs and buts.. and heck, Garry, it's over.
*currently having muscle spasm*

Four days ago, Monday, was the girls competition. The rest of the school had morning assembly and were required (forced) to group in the school hall. This gave us the perfect chance to miss the girls and not meet them before they left. But right after the assembly, i practically ran out till the gates to meet them and wish them luck. -though the girls lost, i still love them.. yeah.

I've heard quite alot from Eshley. Mainly Andie (Andrea), Natalie, and Mandee (Amanda) were the star players. Having good shots and having received shots nicely it just makes me feel soo freakin' proud. The type that i don't feel for myself. The girls were good overall..
There would've been nothing better.

Second day.
This was the day for the guys to compete and we were fooling around waaayy too much in the early morning practices. The competition was due at around 12pm as we were told. But 'we' played like it was months away.. arghh.. anyway, long as we all felt the enjoyment lol. Practice practice practice and soon we had to make a move on to the politeknik school by the school van, which was actually pretty puny for so many dudes that sweat... But before leaving.. we had to see the girls, the colours of our life. >.<
If only we did.

The drive was good considering i somehow enjoyed the ride. The girls called us through the public phone that was available back at school and gave us their message each, though i couldn't hear what they were saying even with the phone on loud speakers. We reached our destination and it was uber big. Impressed as we were, the van dropped us off next to a building that was supposedly the playing ground for the volleyball match.. excitement anyone?

Let's just skip this.

We first had a match with the teknik school. (sorry i have bad memory when it comes to things i don't find important) They.. in my own view.. were possibly beatable. But sadly at that moment our players were still getting used to the game. By players i meant i wasn't in. Yet.

We eventually lost it 2 sets straight, which means we lost two sets of games with them. With me on the outside of the box i was PRETTY pissed at our performance.. seeing that we could've won if we received the balls more properly. Dude beside me (Gavin) couldn't even help but yell at one of the guys. Me? i was angry and my hands were shaking.. sooo.. no need to wonder much. it just wasn't pleasant to the eyes. What to do.. no turning back liao..

We got out the hall and rested outside with the cool/hot air breezing by. Singing and joking together kept us lame and entertained until we realised we were hungry, which by that time we had no time to go (travel) to the canteen. Cuz it was far, man.. like.. i dunno.. 200 meters?!#$%

The next match was with Tshung Tsin. They might just get shot someday the way they slammed THEIR BALLS on the ground and letting them bounce way up high. JUST TO DO IT AGAIN. AND AGAIN. -signs of complete ignorance to be humble, they were showing the world how good they were at slamming balls.. so sad, wrong competition.

But either way.. Us Lok Yuk peeps just walked right through them. Interrupting them. Many other spectators simply gathered round the indoor space to support us voluntarily. For one, some of them were friends of Bob's. One of the star players in our team. Two, people were just sick and tired of the Tshung Tsin players being the ones that think so highly of themselves. BUT. The Tshung Tsin players were good.. so good they won us close with 11-15. Even the teacher expected less from us. But I'm glad and proud we did good. At one point some dude spiked the ball and it hit me square in the chest. Rest of the team gathered round, told me to chill, thought i wanted to kill. it rhymed lol. *boring moment*

After that we just waited and waited for the van to arrive. I couldn't wait to get back.. i really couldn't. The rest of the guys watched another school play, but i had other things in mind. At last the van arrived and all of us sweaty boys got on our ride and rode back to school.

The girls greeted us there and we made a campfire to tell stories. Eshley relived each moment through his words and actions so everyone else that wasn't there could feel what we felt first hand. And laugh.
To actually know the girls cried not being able to wish us luck before we left school was heart-wrenching.. and to know we waited for them so long was the same.

In the end we were reunited and we lived happily ever after. hahaa..
Sleepy Time.

This is how much i...

Sometimes.. things around me happen so fast. They happen to my closest friends, people that tell of how they failed, the times they couldn't find a way out. These things remind me of how much i can't seem to walk away from you. They show me, make me realise how i would be if you looked away. I've always kept it inside, afraid of losing someone as precious as you. I confess i've tried looking around to find something else that might make me ease out of this. But the harder i try to distance myself, the further i fall when i see you again. When the vault to my soul starts to leak, i suddenly feel as if i've lost something. I can't believe how i could just let you pass my mind for a year, and soon it was the next. Maybe this time i'd stutter if i even tried to tell you. I can't fake this anymore, I've truly tried to make you understand. But you just saw me through each year. Never able to break the wall that time made wider, never having the chance to show you. For so long i've kept this, only able to express through words..

how much i love you.